A killer queen, dynamite with a laser beam

I live very close to here

2008-08-26T13:30:47Z

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/rtrs/20080825/tuk-life-britain-supernatural-dc-fa6b408.html

and one of the most haunted sites is down the road from me
TV's most haunted was here, and I can tell you some stories
we're haunted, but it's just simon, we take him with a pinch of salt and let him close doors and turn off lights behind us
he's sat on the edge of the bed and stroked my hair when i was upset
and so many of our photos are ruined by orbs

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-26T02:17:00

2008-08-26T01:21:01Z

zettai kareshi made me cry
stinker
I always cry at Yuu Watase, I know I'm going to bawl at sakura gari, i can sense it coming
but i have to say, it's not a patch on imadoki
Riiko is cute but she struck me as more miaka and I loved Tanpopo and her oh well life goes on attitude.

I'm sitting here sniffling, about to go to bed, and thinking I am so totally pwnd by certain mangaka, yuu watase was one of the first I ever found yanno, I think apart from Sailor Moon FY was the first I bought, I know it's the first i bought in it's entirety, in japanese before i realised what I had done from ebay, and my versions of the first few books are large because it was before they changed that and I have one in newsprint like a proper manga.

so yes, I'm sitting here reading girl manga and sobbing, I always always cry at her, so why do i read them, because apart from the embarrassment of turning into a total girl, the sort you point and laugh at - I really love her work.
but it still wasn't as good as imadoki

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-26T00:54:00

2008-08-25T23:55:15Z

my hm is laughing at me, here I am minding my own business reading Zettai Kareshi as he watches the nascar he recorded and I blurt out "oh Soushi" because he makes this really sweet announcement and he's laughing at me
revenge will be mine.

apparently I am havinga girl moment, which is something remarkable because I'm the least girliest girl he knows, apparently I'm an honourary bloke
am seriously offended
but this is the man who thought card captor sakura was lolicon

meme

2008-08-24T23:41:19Z

from silverylass

When you see this, post snippets of all your works-in-progress.

Twice Bitten
Devora wore a black lace dress tight enough it looked like it was painted on her skin, and her hair was as golden as the revealed skin through the slits of her gown. Her lips were painted a dark black red and large strings of garnets hung from each other. To use her beauty as a weapon her hair was scraped up tight, but it just showed the almost profane fullness of her body, tightly constrained and ready to explode.
She licked her lips as she crossed the dance floor and poor Evan didn't know where to look, because women like Devora, a woman whose beauty was around the place in gothic photographs with her name, never looked at someone like Evan.

His stone angels
Night driving through rural France was a pleasure that Roger had been told about but, like so many things, had never experienced before now. It was soothing and calm and Roger wondered, radio off, headlights casting a solid beam over the road surface, how people lived without this kind of peace, and whether French people, for no other reason than they could, would get in their cars and drive at night just for the joy of it.
He suspected that might be the reason that they all drove like lunatics during the day, because there was a reason to drive in the daylight, to get to work, to shop, to visit, whereas at night, there was just the sound of the engine and the swaying of the crops in the fields. He made a mental note to write it into his book, perhaps as an aside or a footnote, and then promptly forgot all about it.

Tanbi
Because you are here; because I am here; the world will change
Sena dropped the book in his hands to his feet where it fell with a breathy sigh, like a ghost exhaling before the pages fell open hiding the scrap he had found by landing on top of it.
The haiku stood as an accusation. A quickly scratched out set of kanji upon the back of a cheap ukiyo-e print bought from a market stall. He didn't know the handwriting, but it was tall and thin. He knew the haiku though. He would have recognised it anywhere.
He had written it for Jin.
It had been a hot summer day and the world had been mutable. Jin had told a joke. It hadn't been funny. Yet something in the air made itself known with warm flat beer and Sena had started to laugh, lying in the grass by the river where the fireflies swarmed at nightfall.

The Incantrix
I have arrived on the island safely and I am caught unawares by it's unbound beauty. The island is lush with the sorts of plants that we maintained at the botanical gardens were created but here grow wild and in such profusions that they overrun the island. Dorothy, if you could see the colours and the perfumes, dear sister, the perfumes.
The natives did not seem to expect me so I must assume that the missionary, Fr Peters, did not warn them of my coming, and their use of the queen's own English is so far removed from most things I've encountered so as to be almost unintelligible from the local gibberish. Explaining to them that I was here on her majesty's business as the new governor and that a house had been put aside for me and my valet. It eventually involved the trading of several brass buttons from my coat, they are fascinated by brass it seems, a bottle of cheap whiskey that I brought only on the word of the previous governor and a rather lot of gesturing.
I said to Finn that I had obviously angered at least one high official in the government to end with such a remote posting. Then the wind caught in the trees and I found myself thinking that surely this was the paradise that man was exiled from for his original sin. It is truly a sacred sort of beauty to this place, and it reminds me awfully of my poor lost Angela who would have loved it so.

West of the Moon
Angelo Pardi lived in a middle sized inn called La Belle Etoile that was less than three hundred yards from La Massif. With his two older brothers, the famous castrati, he shared the entire top floor of the inn on a permanent retainer paid for by a variety of ladies who loved his brothers. The Pardi brothers were famous performers of the opera and had been invited to sing at the king's wedding and had since spent the day in their cups with women on their knees. Angelo shared no part of it, though he was, in his own way, as famous.
He climbed the back stairs with a jug in his hand and his head down. “Angelo,” his brother, Tonio, had called from the taproom, there was a girl sat beside him, with her blonde head cast back as she snored, but it didn't seem to distract the other girls that surrounded both him and Giuseppe, “look, it is our baby brother, our Angelo,” he told the ladies, “come Angelo, come and drink with us.”
He had walked over, “Not tonight,” he said, “my muse calls me, but I'll take your jug of fortified wine.”

White Butterfly 28
As soon as Crawford was deeply asleep Aya rose from the futon and pulled on Crawford's clothes, as he had been told his own were still damp as Baba had not allowed them to dry off before putting on fresh clothes. He made sure to leave the room as quietly as he could and went to the fire pit room where most everyone was eating their supper.
“Farfarello,” he said carefully, “if you have finished, will you accompany me?”
“Where's Crawford?” Schuldig asked.
“Asleep, he's had a hard day.” Aya said bluntly.
“You reek of sex.” Farfarello said in an equally cold manner.
Aya didn't bother to answer him.

In the bowels of the house, through a hidden door in the burial room and along a long underground corridor was the prison. Most houses of this size had at least one cell, but the Fujimiya house had three, they were called the mouth, the stomach and the bowels, although no one could really remember why.

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-23T23:13:00

2008-08-23T22:27:27Z

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-23T23:03:00

2008-08-23T22:08:02Z

crack cross over theatre

Criminal minds meets deathnote

brought in after the death of the FBI agent the BAU tell L he's paranoid and that the profile doesn't fit that it would be an egomaniacal japanese teenager, because it's a middle aged white man who has uneven job history and issues with his mother (it's always a middle aged white man with spotty job history and issues with his mother)
Reid associates with Kira, JJ makes googly eyes at L and Hotchner considers, but decides against, breaking a smile, L has used them to ship american sweets over. Garcia helps him with maintaining the illegal surveillance of light because she thinks he's kinda hot.
it is framed with quotes which have absolutely nothing to do with the plot
and Light is undone by his own hubris not by their ability to profile.

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-23T22:44:00

2008-08-23T21:45:01Z

simple things make me happy

http://allromanceebooks.com/product-eastofthesun-9841-145.html

lookit, I have an isbn number

Noah in two pink dresses

2008-08-23T00:03:32Z

Gothic lolita set with corset, skirt and petal sleeved blouse

Gothic lolita set without corset, skirt and petal sleeved blouse

Sailor Suit (snaps to be added)

sailor flap and back of skirt

detail of the tie and Noah looking super cute

these pictures were taken and he went back into his dungarees telling his bungle how terribly maligned he was because I had blue fabric but didn't use it
these were both made from the same fat quarter of fabric

fic: White Butterfly 27

2008-08-22T16:27:41Z

Title: White Butterfly 27
Author: Seraphim Grace
Archive: http://www.geocities.com/taliasen1256.html, http://www.Seraphim-grace.livejournal.com. If you want it ask.
Feedback: Always appreciated and replied to.
Rating: 18.
Pairings: Crawford x Ran others to be notified later.
Warnings: Het, yaoi, vast cast.

What astounded Crawford was that despite his injuries Aya had really never looked so beautiful. Perhaps it was the scowl, perhaps it was the bruise that was almost the exact shape of Fuji's geta that brought the side of his face to a bright pink, that was the colour of his lips. Perhaps it was the way his lips were swollen from the blows, or even the broken fingers in the arm strapped to his chest.
He and Fuji now sat on either side of the mirror in the rope hallway in punishment and Crawford stood with the ropes dangling behind him, to prevent flies infesting the house, trying to decide what he wanted to say to both of them.
To his credit Fuji was as battered as Aya. There was a piece of cloth that Baba had tied about his head to catch the blood from a cut on his forehead, one of his eyes was forced closed from the swelling on his cheekbone, his arm was broken, and unlike Aya who sat primly on his shins. Fuji's leg was out in front of him with ice from the lake applied upon his knee.
They didn't look at each other, although Baba had redressed them, their clothes ruined in the fight and the way that she had separated them by throwing buckets of icy water over them. No one else had been able to get involved. Yohji had a wrenched shoulder from getting between them. Schuldig had fetched Crawford who could no more separate them than Naoe, who had been flung aside to bang his head.
When pressed neither of them, both talking with cotton jaws, was able to say where it had come from but Crawford had his suspicions. After all Buchou Tezuka had been gone for a long time and Fuji was always more irritable without him. Crawford's only theory was that Fuji had started the fight, which had gone on long enough for Schuldig to go to town, to find Crawford, and to return with him for Crawford to try and fail to seperate them and Baba to get two buckets of icy cold water to throw over them. So Fuji, Crawford guessed, had picked the fight and Aya had held his own.
That on it's own was worthy of note. No one held their own with Fuji. People always thought of Tezuka as the most dangerous of them with a sword, but Tezuka admitted that it was Fuji who was to be feared. Although he was now a calligrapher he too had held a position in the Empress' personal guard and only the very best were given those. But Aya, a boy of seventeen had held his own in a scrap with him. It had lasted without serious damage for it's duration. Aya's broken fingers were those that Crawford had broken before in temper and Fuji had always favoured that knee.
“When Baba suggested this punishment to me I was going to refuse,” Crawford began crossing his arms across his chest. “then I decided if you were going to behave like children you can be punished like children. You will both sit here until after supper, which you will not have, and then I will consider listening to any excuses you choose to offer.”
Under his breath Aya muttered something about how it was all his fault and Crawford wanted to snigger, but could not and punish them. He would have to, later, attend to his concubine and see just how damaged he was now. The bruises would be spectacular against his white skin. Of course he had no intention of punishing either of them worse than this.
Baba had tended their bruises and their injuries and they were swelling even as he watched. Crawford licked his lips, he had not spent any quality time with Aya since before he had gone to the Taira house for him. Aya looked positively edible to him.
He had spent time with his wife, before her departure to Kyoto, and with his twins, but he had ignored Aya, because Aya had returned so cold. It had seemed to suit them both, Aya did what he was asked without comment and Crawford used him for minor things about the house and basic correspondence, in fact he had taken a rather large weight off Crawford's shoulders even with such light duties because he knew he could trust him.
He hadn't touched him in nearly two months. He intended, of course, to check his injuries, because after all he was his property and things could be overlooked but he hadn't until that moment been going to touch him.
Fuji looked up, “is there anything else, Niichan?” he asked him bluntly, “for Baba has said how long we must sit here, and I would rather get on with things that I might have a bath.”
“You're hard to get on with in this mood,” Crawford corrected him. “I will speak to you in the morning, and I will ask Baba to think of another punishment for the two of you. I could have you both flogged for what you did, vassals fighting each other under the eye of their lord.” He made sure to thin his lips but he was more amused by their consistent bad temper rather than their defiance. “I could have you both executed, even you, Syuusuke, a prince of the house of Fuji.” He narrowed his eyes, “you are blessed that we are so far out of Kyoto that I can be so lenient.” He cast his eyes over the both of them, “Aya, can you walk?” Aya nodded but his frown deepened. “You can attend me this evening, now the sky darkens, Syuusuke, you can go to Baba to see if she will let you bathe, or sit in the dirt until morning.”
Aya stood up, steadying himself on the wall, as much from his legs being numb from sitting on them and tried to bow his head but wobbled, falling against Crawford. Crawford looped his arm about his waist and led him through the main hall to the back corridor and into the library past the place where he and Fuji had destroyed the orchard with their fighting. There were still bits of cloth here and there on the broken branches, and there were blood spots on the veranda. He slid open the door and pushed Aya inside. “Undress,” Crawford barked out the order.
Aya whirled and scowled at him. For a moment his lavender coloured eyes seemed hard and flashing fire, but then he stopped, taking a deep breath and his hands went to the tie of his hakama, undoing it quickly and then letting them pool around his socked feet. His legs were an angry red and there was a few scratches and grazes here and there on his thighs, marks in places that looked like fingernails, and quite a few marks that were going to be spectacular bruises over the next few days.
“I should have you whipped,” Crawford said disapprovingly as Aya pulled off his shirt to show even more of the marks, including a rather perfect imprint of fingers on his ribs underneath the thick slime Baba had applied. “Is the rib broken?”
“No, just bruised, I hit a tree.” Aya replied, “and I was under the impression that Sena was to be whipped in my place for such idiocies.” There was a look of insolence on his pretty face. As Aya matured he became less and less handsome and more pretty, there would be a point where his beauty would be that of a man's, but at the moment it was still a boy's and his prettiness allowed him luxuries he was unaware of.
“You hit a tree? Might I guess,” Crawford drawled, “that you decided, half way through the fight, to just raise your arm and bump into it.”
“No,” Aya answered, “I was thrown, the tree got in the way of my landing.”
“Am I to understand,” Crawford sat down on the raised platform in the library and rested his back against the wall, with his legs stretched out in front of him. He wore solid grey, with his hakama a shade darker than his shirt, and a dark blue haori over it. He was still dressed in what he had worn to town. “That there will be problems with the cherries next autumn, the trees don't like such sudden strikes.” He sounded amused, removing his glasses and rubbing the lenses on the corner of his haori to clean them.
“And the water wheel.” Aya replied, “Fuji's leg hit it quite badly, I think it might have broken the paddle. Or the bone, there was a distinct cracking noise.”
It was such a perfectly practical answer that Crawford laughed almost despite himself. Ran might have cowered but this new Aya, this Aya that had returned to him from the House of Sleep was not prepared to. For the first time he began to see the potential everyone else had reminded him of. This Aya was an equal, a dangerous young man, where Ran had been a child in love with his own misery. “Are you sure that wasn't your hand?”
“My fingers were still healing, it did not take much to break them again, master.” He said the word with a distinctly sarcastic tone, “Baba thinks that more milk in my diet will help them heal.” He lifted his hand, “but Fuji's forearm was hard enough that when I struck him my fingers gave, not him.”
“Shion would be proud.” Crawford said, and then gestured that Aya turn around so he could inspect the marks on his back. “You held your own.”
“Barely,” Aya admitted, “and only because he didn't expect much of me. I look forward to Buchou Tezuka's return that I might learn with him.”
At that Crawford barely held back a snarl. “Where did he touch you?”
“Nowhere I did not touch him.” Aya replied and went to lift his hakama. “I am tired, and bruised, if you are merely going to be possessive I shall take my leave, I hoped to bathe in the lake to take some of the ache from my bones.”
“I am permitted to be possessive.” Crawford corrected him. “After all you belong to me. Set up the go board. We have not played in some time; I would hope you hadn't forgotten such things.”
“We have not played since the first time you fucked me.” Aya corrected, but nevertheless, and completely naked, went to the cupboard where he retrieved the board and the two bowls of stones. “I am surprised that you wish to play now, master, and not bend me over the board to inspect that there are no finger marks or scratches in those places that you are so determined belong only to you.”
“I imagine that in your time away you kept yourself amused with both Naoe and Ken-kun. Or did you amuse yourself with Fuji?”
Aya blinked and nearly dropped the board he carried. “I did not, you were specific in your orders, that none was to touch me, and none did. I have been loyal to our arrangement even if you have not.” He stopped for a moment, taking a breath and setting down the board before Crawford, and then, completely naked sat down in front of it. “I have not taken anyone to my bed since the night before I left for the Taira estates. Can you say the same?”
Crawford looked affronted for a moment, at the concept that Aya might think that their relationship should be monogamous on Crawford's side, then slipping his glasses back on he laughed. “I don't have to,” he said, “I am your master, but none have shared my bed, nor my bath, I have been too busy, what release I had I took from my own hand.”
Aya blushed. It was a charming gesture and a reminder that somewhere inside this new icy exterior was the Ran who had hidden in women's clothes. Obviously lost for words he answered “hn.”
Crawford lifted one stone from each pot, then holding them out in closed fists offered for Aya to choose. Aya took the left, and the black stone giving Crawford the first move. He didn't bother with a handicap.

When they played before, Crawford had known that in ten years, maybe, Aya would have been a great go player, he was competent and comfortable around the board but lacked experience. He had made silly mistakes simply because he could not see them coming. Now he took time to ponder each move, shifting where he sat, completely naked, as he contemplated the placement of each stone so carefully that it was Crawford, and not Aya, that noticed he was shivering with cold. Crawford stood up. “If you wanted something to drink,” Aya snapped, “you should say so, I am your servant after all.”
Crawford just laughed, lifting the brazier by it's ivory handle and brought it closer to where the two of them sat. “You are cold.” He said.
“I don't need your charity.” Aya hissed at him.
“It isn't charity,” Crawford said, shucking off his haori and laying it over his concubine's shoulders. It was warm and slightly gratifying to see the way Aya curled into it and the deep breaths he took. It must, Crawford realised, smell of him. There was a typical response to that, a sort of animal possessive urge, but he damped it down. “You belong to me, to protect, cherish and love, just as Kimi is your pet,” he referred to the small chin dog that Aya kept beside him when he worked, “you are mine.”
Aya pulled the haori around his shoulders. “Thank you.” He said.
“Your clothes are damp so there is no point putting them back on,” he said firmly, “if you are still cold, tell me, I shall fetch a futon from the cupboard for you.”
Aya narrowed his eyes and for a moment was silent. “It's your turn.” he said finally.
Crawford didn't look at the board before he laid the next stone. “You are still shivering.” He said and went to the cupboard, pulling out one of the futons and shaking it out before he wrapped it around Aya, taking a deep breath of his hair. He smelled of lineament and ointment, but lingering under it was the soft scent of lilacs in his hair.
“Fuji must be cold.” Aya said suddenly, “that hallway is chilly at the best of times.”
“I thought you were rowing.” Crawford said, tightening his arms about Aya and trying to control his jealousy.”
“We were fighting.” Aya corrected. “I have not slept well lately, and I have had an itch that I couldn't scratch, a simple spar ended with bad temper taking control and we fought. He missed his Buchou and was as irritable as I for most of the same reasons, it was the only way that we could scratch our mutual itches.” He smiled, knowing and enjoying that Crawford was jealous. “I am not angry with him, he did no more to me than I did to him, we fought, that is the end of that.” He turned around so that Crawford's cheek was against his, Crawford's knees against his back, “I was going to ask Naoe and Ken to bed down with him tonight, he does not sleep well alone.”
Crawford stood up with an angry snort, “shall I send him to bed with his supper as well?”
“If you want,” Aya answered calmly turning and running his hand the length of the outside of Crawford's thigh. “This is the closest I've been to you since you sent me away,” he said bluntly, “it is a pity I'm so battered that all we can do is play go.” Aya's grin turned shark like, “or because I have a friendship that you cannot understand.”
Crawford's hand wrapped around Aya's neck under the blanket and gripped it tight. “You belong to me.” He repeated, the jealousy thick on his breath.
“And yet I have a friend.”
Aya was baiting him, Crawford knew that. The last time Aya had baited him he ended up struck and Aya did it regardless. When he had been baited with Aya he had raped him. He didn't know what Aya wanted. “I shall let him wait out the rest of his punishment around the fire with Baba.” Crawford grated out the concession, half worried that he would lose his lover to Fuji, Fuji had an innate cruelty, he would destroy Aya just to get to Crawford for some slight. It didn't matter what one did to Fuji, he did not care, but cross his inner circle and he would destroy you. If he hadn't been part of the Empress' guard he would have been recruited as a negotiator. Fuji would betray his buchou only to destroy another, and Tezuka had been gone for months.
Crawford made his decision. “We will be leaving for Kyoto presently,” he said, “I shall ask Fuji to go ahead to prepare the house for our arrival, with Schuldig, and Kudoh.”
“That changes the bet.” Aya answered coldly, and placed his own stone on the board.
“Bet?” Crawford asked.
“You have been busy,” Aya laughed to himself, “Kudoh, Schuldig, and Farfarello have a bet over which of them will get to take Ken's virginity, I believe the pot is three gold dragons. Of course I'm not supposed to know about it, but Naoe has ears in the strangest places.” He continued to smile, happily in control of this conversation. Naoe had always been loyal to Crawford before.
“Then I shall send all three.” Crawford answered, “I wouldn't want to deprive you of your amusement.”
“Believe me,” Aya said, “you never do. Send the twins as well, and ask Fuji to prepare those things for me that I asked, he'll know what I mean.”
Crawford narrowed his eyes, “I am fond of Syuusuke,” he said using his first name carefully, “and he is my wife's brother, but don't think I won't use some of the more colourful items I found in the bowels of this house when you showed me the prison upon him if you even think to betray me with him. I don't like other people touching what's mine.” He grated out those last words.
Aya just laughed.

When he returned, Aya had cleared away the go board, leaving the game unfinished, and laid out the futon with a piece of old fabric covering it. He had a bottle of oil in a bowl of water over the brazier. It was not boiling but it was clearly to warm the oil.
“You work too hard,” he said and sat, naked but for the haori Crawford had draped over him that he had now slipped his arms through. “Strip.” He said bluntly, “you will not work tonight, you will make yourself ill, and I have no intention of being left to Schuldig.” Aya's expression softened somewhat, “between us I think he's something of a pervert.”
Crawford laughed and pulled off his clothes, “face down?” He asked. Aya nodded but his face had returned to its impassive mask. Crawford lay on the mat but started a little when Aya crouched over him.
“I tried to warm the oil,” Aya said, “but it will probably still be a bit cold,” and then dribbling the liquid, which wasn't quite blood warm, unto his back Aya began to rub in circles. “Don't say anything, just enjoy.”
Crawford could feel Aya's palms and the pressure they exerted, the occasional scratch of nails and the sensation of the bandages on his broken fingers. It was literally pushing the tension out of his shoulders. “You work too hard,” he repeated softly, his breath making soft whispers on the back of his neck, “just relax. Trust me.”
“What happened in the House of Sleep?” Crawford asked, his voice was softer than he intended.
“I learned what it was to be a Fujimiya,” Aya said softly, running his hands down Crawford's arms, squeezing just the right amount, “and what it is to be a slave.” He laid his lips softly, they were wet perhaps from the oil, on the back of Crawford's neck. “Command me.”
Crawford could feel all the tension and stress vanishing from his muscles under Aya's hands, where had he learned to do this, he wondered as he began to knead the flesh of his ass, turning it in separate directions to maximise what he felt, but never quite hard enough. “Do as you will.” Crawford finally managed, the smell of Aya, of ointment and oil and the herbs in the brazier combining to make it so that he was having to work to think.
“As you wish,” Aya said and began to run his hands the length of his thighs.
After an eternity, it felt, Aya turned him over. And he could see Aya's eyes, the way Aya's tongue peeked out from between his lips, and how he himself was half hard, which shocked him for Aya had done nothing that was in any way sexual. But Crawford had given him that choice to use or abuse as he saw fit. He wondered if Aya was going to provoke him again but decided at worst he could take care of any frustration himself, and the twins had not left yet.
Aya's hands were softer than they should have been for this kind of massage, Crawford knew that, and that they lingered a little long on his chest but avoided his nipples. “If you're going to touch,” Crawford groused, “touch me.”
Aya smiled. He took a small piece of cloth, the sort that he would use to wash his face of an evening, and laid it over his crotch, then sat beside him and began to touch in a much more determined manner, his hands slick and warm from the oil and his nails deliciously sharp.
First one finger, then another, ran over Crawford's nipple, then his oiled palm, and he pinched softly, smiling but never quite enough, almost but never quite. He ran his finger tips over Crawford's mouth that he could tell that the oil was slightly sweet and tasted slightly of cherries. Crawford wondered if Aya had taken it from Baba's pantry, and if so what had he done with the oiled cherries it had held. Crawford reached out with his tongue to catch Aya's mouth but Aya pulled his hand back. “Just feel,” Aya said, “Close your eyes.”
“But I like to watch.” Crawford was surprised at his tone for it was almost a whine.
“As you wish,” Aya repeated. “I live to serve.”
He ran his fingernails, slick with oil down to Crawford's armpits, through the scratchy hair there and back to his nipples, surrounded as they were with short dark hairs although his chest was not truly hair there was a line from his crotch that reached up around his nipples. And Aya did nothing else, his hands might dip around Crawford's abdomen, they scratched through his hair but they did nothing else. “By Amaterasu's beard,” Crawford managed slamming his head back, “use your mouth.”
“As you wish,” Aya repeated calmly without changing his expression.
Crawford knew that there were slaves in the capital who knew the exact line of obeisance, that they could take some liberties but some were for the master to demand, and wondered where Aya had drawn the line.
Aya lowered his mouth to Crawford's nipple, licking away the oil with a pointed tongue as their eyes met. He was skilled in this, because Crawford had taken the time to teach him how to do this well, he used lips and teeth and just the right amount of suction as his hands ran along his sides and scratched through his hair. But he did nothing else, he didn't use his hands to help as he switched from one side to the other. He didn't change his attentions from his nipples even as his hands reached up and ran over his mouth and Crawford's erection was clearly tenting the piece of fabric he had lain over him to maintain a hint of propriety.
If this was what Aya had learned in the House of Sleep then Crawford was torn between bringing all the armed forces he could to burn it to the ground and sending them gifts for this was surely the line between torture and bliss.
Aya was watching him and when Crawford realised he felt slightly stupid, Aya wasn't watching him for the sexual reaction but waiting for him to command. A slave could be whipped for overstepping the boundaries so he was waiting for him to tell him what to do. It added an extra sexual thrill to the event, even if it had been months since anyone but he had touched himself. He suspected that Aya knew that and which is why he played this game, both of his hands on Crawford and taking his cues from him. This was a game, Crawford knew, and Aya was so battered from the fight that he was trying to do his duty, and Crawford put his hand on Aya's head and pushed him down, over the straining erection. He could play too, even if it was so hard to think.
“Through the cloth,” he said and Aya dutifully looked up and said. “As you wish.”
With his hands on his hips, more to steady himself than to hold Crawford down, he opened his mouth and took the very top of the erection, complete with fabric, and began to gently suck, he lapped at him with the very tip of his tongue.
Crawford thought he might go mad, this was maddening, because it was almost enough. Aya was not the best at giving head, but he made up for it with enthusiasm and diligence. Aya was being perfectly diligent, not arousing and smiling as he did so, bobbing his head and using his teeth through the cloth.
As Crawford cried out his hand grabbed about and patted around for the cloth, pulling it away. Aya raised his head, his lips swollen and there was saliva dripping from his mouth. “Do you want to come in my mouth, master?” He asked. “Or would you prefer I finished you with my hand?”
“Mouth,” Crawford snapped.
“As you wish,” Aya repeated and went to work with gusto. He didn't bother with niceties just bobbed his head and sucked, his hand, still slick with oil, finding his balls and cupping them gently as he rubbed and bobbed and Crawford just stared, his mouth open and strange noises escaping him.
Aya did not stop him when he started to thrust into his mouth, just moved back to allow him, and he could feel himself nudging the back of Aya's throat and even the involuntary gagging. It was enough to push him over the edge as Aya's slick hand travelled between his buttocks and finding his opening pushed inside, just to the first knuckle.
Crawford came and came and came, most of it landed in Aya's mouth but there was a spray across his chin and chest.
Crawford just lay there for a long while, boneless trying to catch his breath.
“Stay,” he finally managed as Aya stood up.
“As you wish.” From the cupboard he took a second futon and laid it over his master, then curled up next to him. “Now sleep, let me worry about you for a while.”
“But you,” Crawford protested, feeling Aya's erection against his own hip.
“I'm fine.” Aya said, “it will go away. And maybe in the morning I'll be feeling less sore and,” he smiled to himself noticing Crawford had fallen asleep. He kissed Crawford's forehead softly and then snuggled down next to him to sleep himself, though it was not nearly late enough.

document scanner

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-22T17:11:00

2008-08-22T16:18:05Z

I'm going to spam a bit today
I've noticed that East of the sun has slipped out out the fictionwise top twenty, it's 23
I've written it, and the next time you whine that i never update anymore I'm oging to point out I've published a novel and a short story and you can blooming well buy them to give me a time out

I just got WB27 back from the betas but I haven't checked it yet
and I made noah some outfits which are super cute and girly
he would like it pointed out that he is all boy, and although he has nothing against either homosexuality or transvestitism a choice would be nice
suggesting I should have got a girl doll
of course then they'd be a tom boy
I'm uploading them to photobucket now so you'll be pic spammed in a bit

so i made a sailor suit and a gothic lolita set, both in baby pink with lots of white ribbon, I still have a few snaps to attach but other than that they're good to go
they're for the patterns but I might sell them regardless.

hm has decided, based entirely on synopsis that hikaru no go is the most boring manga known to man, because it's a boy learning to play a board game
little does he know that I have the anime, mwa mwa mwa

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-21T00:46:00

2008-08-20T23:48:35Z

two things

nice and simple enough

one I changed my layout so you can go ooh and aah over it
the picture is from Sakura Gari that I tweaked

and WB27 is not only twice as long as usual but at the betas already
and you thought I wouldn't keep up my lj cold turkey

meme: 5 favourite of your own fics

2008-08-16T01:49:05Z

Sometimes it's ok to pimp yourself out. Post a list of your top five fics favorite you've written, regardless of fandom or the reason you love them. This isn't about the BEST things you've written, but what you LOVE most. Then tag five other people to do the same.

pimped by giving_ground

1. Cloths of Heaven, WK NC17
I am constantly surprised by CoH especially as it was a nano fic, they're not meant to be any good but something clicked when i wrote it, it practically wrote itself in fact, and some of the phrasing is very beautiful, some of it awkward as I made the same attempt as lyricalness and fell flat on my face, but some of it is haunting
it was also the first time i changed my mind on the ending about twenty thousand times, I was going to kill Chloe, I was going to kill Aya, I was going to kill Crawford, I was going to sod it and kill them all and everyone was involved in planning it. A lot of it was written to spite my creative writing professor who made me feel like untalented shit but then i find lines in it like "he looked like a chessmaster who had lost his queen" and catch my breath over and over again. I have read it a hundred times easy and it always feels like someone else's work, though i remember writing it.

2. The Fox, the Monk and the Mikado of All night's dreaming GW R
this is the natural heir to Human Frailty as it was supposed to be the entry to the GWYaoi OTP contest the year after, it didn't happen. Based around a fairytale made famous by Neil Gaiman this told two stories, one of an elderly relena telling the story, and the story itself. I changed the ending and the beginning and a goodly chunk of the middle truth be told and each character was actually from GW, something i learned with HF and repeated with CoH, the image of Dorothy as the young witch still makes me laugh to myself, and Duo's eventual diagnosis of the story just sums it all up. And something about naughty fox Duo was kinda hot.

3. Paradise Lost WK NC17
Probably the most nihilistic of all my WK pieces, taking place after the fact in a world where it was already too late to do anything. This required lots and lots of research into the drama cds to make it real but what i mostly remember is lying in bed listening to Placebo's A song to say goodbye and knowing this was Aya saying goodbye to Yohji for the crimes committed against their relationship. It is nihilistic but in it's own way it makes it beautiful.
It was posted alla prima, meaning it came out in one go and wasn't betaed but that seemed to add to it's mystique, spelling mistakes and all.

4. The Fullness of Earthly Bliss WK NC17
I took the title from Schiller and had this wonderful story set between the OVAs and Gluhen of Crawford and Schuldig running, as much from themselves as each other. I wrote it to a prompt and it ran out of me like a dose of the salts pretty much as is, an open ending meant some people listed it as a deathfic but no one actually died. As crawford quotes at the end "It is a consuming of oneself and the past."

5. Akazukin WK NC17
I wrote this and heartbreaker at the same time with the same characters and in my head they have become one great big meshed fic and i love them both, in fact if there were more slots they'd both have one. Where heartbreaker dealt with the end of an affair, Akazukin was it's beginning. This was the transformation of Omi told as a fairytale in which both he and Nagi could be the big bad wolf, but the final dismissal of Ken just still rocks my socks.

I wandered out of GW before creating that kind of work in it, and those of you waiting for BRK, it's still too new, don't like it yet.

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-16T01:55:00

2008-08-16T01:02:16Z

i know i know i know
I'm writing honest, I wrote like 3k today before i burned my hand and wrote the start of a great big long scene in WB, I spoke it over with my beta and we're going to stop cutting out scenes just because one of us doesn't like them

anyhow
I'm watching prince of tennis
and it's the first match against Rikkai Dai
I'm taken with Sanada, but he just had my name all over him, and am in love with adayume's seven sins pictures
but Marui popped up and the muse went ping-pong
he is 14/15 with a sweet tooth, scarlet hair, lavender eyes and very pale
as sanada points out the strokes in tennis and with a katana are not that different
the muse goes - witness protection program, changed his name when joined kritiker and i go, shush, I'm watching this.

although the subtitles on this are brill, every time someone wins 6 games to 1 it goes 1st of June across the bottom, other that its fine, but three games to two, second of march
but i did write today and didnt procrastinate too badly, I cleaned the new floor, I did some ironing, but I did write. I have witnesses and everything

fic: That time of year

2008-08-15T21:20:40Z

Title: That time of year
Author: Seraphim Grace
Series: Weiss Kreuz – Nekojita’s shadowverse
Rating: U – Ed has a potty mouth
Pairing: none really
Notes: Nekojita owns everything that’s not owned by some large conglomerations in Japan.

I wrote this weeks ago for nekojita promptly forgot about it, but she reminded me yesterday and said it was okay to share

Crawford sat in the inn's common room in a mood foul enough he had driven everyone else out without a spoken word. He sat drinking very expensive twenty five year old whiskey like it was water and it was still hours until noon. He hadn't shaved, and Jo suspected he hadn't even brushed his hair. The other bounds who lived in the inn were crammed into her kitchen for the most part avoiding him. Jo had never seen him so dishevelled, or the curt manner in which he ordered the bottle be left, or the way he stared so disconsolately into the flames in the fireplace.
“We have to do something,” Yohji said, rolling out pastry. Jo was damned if she was going to have all these able bodied men in her kitchen without making use of them, except Ed who had a tendency to eat more of the vegetables he peeled than put them in the cook pot. Roy, however, was a godsend to any kitchen. “We can't just lurk in here like criminals on work release,” he said, Jo glowered at him, “there are other things we could all be doing.”
“I was half way through a translation.” Ed said, “but I daren't cross the common room to the stairs. He looks at me funny.”
So far only Aya, clinging to the shadows, had managed to make his escape to the library with the words that he was not coming down again until Crawford was gone. Jo thought that this was ironic, that the great and terrifying Kage was running from one man who sat by the fire drinking and saying nothing.
She had to admit, though, that Crawford didn't normally strike her as being dangerous, living mostly in his own wits, but right now he did look like he would rip out the throat of anyone who disturbed him and leave what was left of the meat to Ken.
That reminded her she needed to take the beef out to baste it – maybe add more honey.
“Ed,” she said turning, “bring that tray of sandwiches out to Crawford,” she said, so far Ed was the only one he hadn't snarled at, instead he just stared at the boy.
“no,” Ed said backing off, “he can go hungry.”
“and you can clean the twenty five year old whiskey vomit off the walls.” Jo said putting her hands on her hips, “and help him to bed because you weren't prepared to feed him enough that it doesn't happen.”
“Roy,” Ed said ducking behind his lover, who was stirring a broth, “protect me.”
“Sorry, love,” Roy said patting him on the head, “You're on your own.”
“He's your brother.” Ed protested.
“I'll defend you from him” Roy said and then bent down to kiss his mate on the crown of his golden head, “but not Jo”
“Fucking coward,” Ed snarled, somewhat appeased by the kiss, “don't know why I ended up mated to an old pervert, can't even protect me from an old woman.” He stomped across to the tray of sandwiches and with a scowl that should have curdled milk carried them out to the common room.
Yohji never got the chance to count to five before he was back in, pale and shaking. “He says, thank you, Jo, for your consideration.” He moved over to Roy and wrapped his arms about his waist, “I wanna go home now, fuck my translation, Al can finish it tomorrow.”
Roy put his spare arm about his mate, “After we have the soup, promise.” he said and then kissed Ed on the forehead, never once losing his concentration on the pot he was stirring and maintaining the constant flame under.
“Why is everyone hiding in here?” Duo asked from the doorway, he wore his cape and had stopped in for a bite to eat before his shift, which started mid morning, with Trowa loping along silently behind him.
“Crawford.” Yohji said, “he's taken over the common room and driven everyone out.”
Trowa narrowed his green eyes for a moment and then made a small oh shape with his mouth, “it's that time of year.” He said, “Ed, will you help me for a moment?” Ed, who was never one to back down from a challenge went white and shook his head. “I could go and get Al from the Rockbell's, he can do this too.”
Jo poured him a cup of coffee as she watched this, it wasn't surprising that Trowa would know what was wrong, and how to help it, if not solve the problem completely. Trowa thanked her for her generosity with a bow of his head, “is there an empty room, upstairs? we need some privacy for this.”
“I'm not going to let you sacrifice him.” Roy said tightening his grip around Ed.
“I'm not going to.” Trowa said, “but sometimes you need...” he looked at Duo then reached across and squeezed his hand, “he'll be fine, I'll be there.”
“He fucking looks at me like I'm something nasty stuck to his shoe,” Ed said, “and he wants to wipe me out of the world like some kinda stain and then at the same time he wants to fucking eat me, it's fucking creepy. I mean he doesn't normally even fucking notice me.” He reached out and took Trowa's coffee from his hand knocking it back in a single swallow. “Fucking tall fucking Crawford, fucking bad temper, fucking,” after that it devolved into a quiet and rather foul mumble that Jo couldn't make out any more apart from the occasional fucking.
“Do you mind,” Trowa asked lifting the cooking brandy, “if I take this,” he stepped across to Duo and kissed him softly on the lips, “tell Birman I need to take a personal day, I'll be in tomorrow, it's nothing to worry about, really,” he kissed him again, “and Roy, won't the army miss you?”
“No,” Roy said rather huffily, “I got the day off for good behaviour.”
“Well go shopping,” Trowa who was normally so quiet that he could blend into a room had taken charge, “out the lot of you, come back after lunch, it's going to be fine.”
“But,” Ed protested, “my soup.”
Duo laughed from the doorway, “looks like someone has to take one for the team.” Roy, who because of his bound nature barely got on with Duo at the best of times, growled the flames under the pot surging.
Jo batted him quickly about the back of the head with her spoon. “You're burning the soup.”

Trowa carried the cooking brandy in one hand and pushed Ed with the other as he sat down beside Crawford, making Ed stand beside him. “You're scaring them, you know.” He said softly. “They don't understand. It's that time of year again.” He poured himself a glass of the brandy and swallowed it, appreciating the burn. “I brought you a peace offering, I thought it would be better if you went upstairs.”
“You're a good friend,” Crawford said, “Ed,” he looked at him, “just go away, please.”
Ed didn't need to be told twice, he made for the door at just short of a run.
“I thought he'd help.”
“Not really. I want to,” he stopped, “Roy would kill me, and I wouldn't blame him and it's not even Ed I see.”
“I know.” Trowa said, “it's her.”
“Yeah, and they don't even look alike” he lifted the glass and saluted the empty air with it, “happy birthday,” he said, and looked down at the fireplace again. He had taken off his glasses and looked strangely vulnerable without them.
“I never knew her.” Trowa said, “and I imagine what it would be like without Duo and...” He took another sip of the brandy, “I don't know how you did it.”
Crawford emptied his glass. “Neither do I,” he said, “neither do I.”

Trowa returned to the kitchen long past supper when Crawford was asleep in one of the upstairs rooms. Ed and Roy had been sat in the common room when he came down playing cards but followed him into the kitchen. “He's asleep.” Trowa said, “he said I should tell you.”
He sat down at the kitchen table and sighed. “He had a mate,” he started, “no, he should have had a mate.”
“But,” Yohji protested. “I thought that once they met...” He left it open.
“He made sure never to meet her because the alternative was better than watching the Elders have her.”
“I didn't know.” Roy said, “we keep secrets, our family.” He sounded lost and tightened his grip about Ed who said nothing but allowed himself to be held which was unusual.
“He didn't want you to know, but it's her birthday, or it would have been her birthday.” He corrected himself, “and when Crawford saw the future he saw her happy with him, even briefly, he loved her, he was part of her.”
“What happened to her?” Ed asked quietly.
“She married someone else and had a daughter, and he did what he could to keep her safe but knew that her children's children would be more important than his own happiness so he let her go. She died.” He said softly and then stopped, lowering his eyes. “So he watched over her daughter and then her sons,” he looked up and matched Ed's golden eyes with his own even stare. “And sometimes it gets too much and he he mourns her, in his own stubborn way.”
“Why didn't he tell us?” Aya asked quietly from the shadows.
“Which is sweeter,” Trowa said, “love or it's loss?”
Aya went quiet. “S'fucking rubbish.” Ed said, “I asked Crawford why he didn't get himself a woman and he said he had a mate coming, that she wasn't born yet.”
“It's not unheard of for a bound to have two mates you know,” Yohji said, “look at Masato.”
“Who was she?” Roy asked quietly.
“It doesn't matter.” Trowa said, “she's gone, and he's asleep and in tomorrow it will be like it never happened.” He stepped up and ran his hand over Ed's hair as he passed, “just go easy on him tomorrow, eh, Ed? or I'll kill you.”

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-14T23:59:00

2008-08-14T23:24:22Z

I might drop off the face of the world for a bit apart from the occaisonal fic post
the problem is that I am accepting LJ as a procrastination and using Lj as a reason not to write or do anything really
if you go back to before i was on LJ I updated every day, I wrote copious amounts because I had nothing else to do
so i find that i write nothing because I'm too busy getting involved in all these fan wangsts and what not
so I taking the opportunity to not, the new laptop has internet access which means I don't write i procrastinate, the old one didn't for that very reason
it's nothing to worry about, I am just taking a time out to write, not to do anything stupid or worrying, just to write
to step away from the wangsts and whatnot and write

I picked up bad habits from fanfic that i never did before and i became addicted to feedback
I used to trust my own works because there were maybe two or three people that read them and i trusted them to be honest, they discussed it honestly and weren't afraid to tell me i was shite
I would write at least ten thousand words a day, and read honking great big thick novels of 200k on the days i didn't write. I carried around lever arch folders with novels in them, scribbling away, wearing out those pens you could stab into cans and whatnot
I type quickly as well. And yet all i do is waste time playing on LJ and DOA, I explain complicated sewing things rather than live up to my own potential as a writer.
I apologised to a writer today because I ripped her a new one about the same thing and then apologised for being a hypocrite.
I opened a new notebook today and wrote 5 sides of Incantrix, I'm scrapping it because I'm changing the voice, and I might put my laptop away for a while for that reason.
I know LJ isn't the problem, I'm blaming myself because I take the opportunity to waste my time, I read fics so bad I read thirty thousand words of them to convince myself I wasn't mistaken and shouldn't have read past the first pgh and I do it simply because it's not writing. Any port in a storm.
so I'm going to be quiet for a while, I am not dead, I am not doing anything strange I'm watching Prince of Tennis (noticing that the Josei Shonan coach looks like Tezuka in drag and fudomine is over-run by cats, every time they flashback to fudomine there are more cats) and writing, probably original but maybe some WB, some other stuff, who knows.

ficlet: Subway request for Iamavice

2008-08-13T22:10:39Z

ficlet: Subway fragment for iamavice
pairing CxR
NC17

Ran was jostled as the subway train ran over a seam in the track, the only thing holding him upright was the press of bodies and the strap hanging form the ceiling he had his hand through. “Be still,” a voice said as strong hands wrapped around his waist and a hot balmy breath ran over the back of his neck. “Keep quiet, or I'll stop,” one hand reached around from his waist, hard finger tips running over the side of his jean covered hip.
The back behind him was solid and strong and he leaned into it, wanting to stop this; thinking perhaps he should stop this but terrified he might stop this.
Strong fingertips dug into his waist, holding him firm as the other hand reached to cup his crotch and rubbed. Ran cast his head back against that strong solid back, as the suit wristed hand rubbed up and down. “Make a noise and I'll stop.” The voice repeated.
Ran bit down on his lip to quiet over the general hubbub of the busy subway car. The fingers, weight resting on the tips, as they walked up to the zipper and slowly slid it down and Ran felt every tooth loosen as it opened, then the hand, hot dry and rough reached into the gap. Hard fingernails scraped through pubic hair in a prelude to the dry palm that then wrapped itself around his hardness and began to stroke.
The car ran over another seam and Ran was jerked forward into that hand and the back to the hips and the hardness concealed there. The car was packed, the hand was dry and rough and the hardness against his ass was prominent. He came.
The hand that was around his waist reached back and pulled out a small white handkerchief shook it out and then wiped first the hand, and then his cock, as Aya hissed because it was too much, and then pushed his cock back into his pants and zipped him up.
The faceless body behind him kissed his neck softly. “Lovely.” he said.
“Crawford,” Ran said turning to face him, “that wasn't lovely, it was really hot.” So Ran realised, was Crawford's laugh to that.

reaction to the article from last post

2008-08-13T13:14:13Z

Now I knew it sounded familiar but didn't know why
I was one of the authors quizzed on why i write M/m
now i am a magpie and nevre destroy anything if i can help it
so i looked it up and here is the original email i sent her

Hi, Jean
Congrats on the new column. I'll try and answer the questions for you.

1) If you're a woman who writes m/m, what attracted to you to it orginally?
I was drawn to the stories, most m/m features characters who may not be equal but never come across as weak. I found quickly that gay men writing m/m were all doom and gloom but women wrote romances that almost always would never happen in real life. The byronic qualities of the character were never as villainous simply because the men could stand beside them instead of up to them, if that makes sense. That isn't to say that occasionally you don't get the "chicks with dicks" problem where characters might as well be girls, but especially in fantasy or historical fiction a man has very few restrictions, he can literally do who and what he wants, where a woman would be caught in a very narrow role. That and the sex was hot.

2. Do you write m/m exclusively?
No, I go where the story wants. It's one of those things, I might sit down and say this will be m/m and then the instant the characters meet they loathe each other, or the girl in the m/f drives the other to men, I get wary of f/f simply because I have never written it, but m/m and m/f are the same to me, it all depends on the characters and what works best in the story.

3. Do you get advice and feedback from the man or men in your life?
I'm very fortunate that I know some gay and bisexual men who will tell me exactly when I go wrong, often at length. I couldn't expect them to understand period pain so I ask questions upon questions and listen when they tell me something. Yet oddly one thing I have noticed is that they often point out that my characters aren't gay, they're just men who sleep with each other because that's who they desire at the time. The vast majority of my characters aren't so much bisexual as open to opportunity which fascinates them and apparently is very rare.

4. Do you intend to continue writing m/m until you die at age 115, your bony hands still on
the keyboard?
By that point I hope they've developed hardware that can read my mind... but yes, love is love, if my boys want to fornicate I'm happy for them to do it. If they're in love and want to tell me their stories I'm more than happy to write them out for them.

5. Would you list and describe your m/m publications?
Presently I have East of the Sun released with www.eternalpress.ca as of 7/7/8

-------------------
the original email

Happy 4th of July for everyone who celebrates it.

I am Jean Roberta, erotic writer in various flavors (f/f, m/f, m/m, menage), BUT I'm not wearing my fiction-writing hat at the moment.

I also write reviews, opinion pieces and research-based articles.

My new column, "Sex Is All Metaphors," just went live on July 1 (Canadian independence day) on the Erotic Readers & Writers Ass'n site:

www.erotica-readers.com - look for "Smutters Lounge."

I'm planning to write a piece for my column on the popularity of m/m sexually-explicit fiction (erotica, erotic romance, suspense, space opera - I'm not picky) written by women. (This means people born with female plumbing - butch personalities or alter egos don't count.)

This intrigues me. I'm a fan of some of the women writers of m/m here, but I hesitate to write much of that stuff myself because the challenges seem obvious! (A self-identified man on another list once said that to write from a man's viewpoint, you have to imagine yourself "sitting on a prostate" even if you don't have one of your own. This seems as far beyond my imagination as menstrual cramps seem to most of the men I know!)

I would love to get answers to these questions:

1) If you're a woman who writes m/m, what attracted to you to it orginally?

2. Do you write m/m exclusively?

3. Do you get advice and feedback from the man or men in your life?

4. Do you intend to continue writing m/m until you die at age 115, your bony hands still on
the keyboard?

5. Would you list and describe your m/m publications?

If you want to answer these questions, thank you in advance!

- Jean

i was never sent the article
I'm still quietly fuming and considering eating a big chocolate cake in sheer bad temper!

now checking it on LRC I found this nugget

from an author called Lee Rowan

Thanks... when we start seeing research on whether Tolstoy had to
imagine he had menstrual cramps in order to write Anna Karenina, I'll
consider it relevant to wonder why women seem to be able to write about
the human experience from a male POV. ...okay, I'll be good...

Lee

and from another called Pam (no last name) but one of the mods of the list

LOL

and breath
and cake!

my take on women writing m/m,

2008-08-12T18:01:42Z

inspired by this article
http://www.erotica-readers.com/ERA/SL/JR-Turn-ons_and_Squicks.htm
and with my blood boiling I'm going to write an essay about m/m fiction! She has angered that part of me you hardly ever see, the academic

I just.... yes well...

so why do you write m/m
why do you read m/m
I know the historical and sociological reasons but tell me the personal ones. Tell me what it is about two men that butters your muffin, and what it is that turns you off
be honest, if you don't like it say so but say why, it's not everyone's cup of tea and that is the same as someone not liking horror or crime novels, it's not a judgement statement and it doesn't make you a homophobe, it just means you don't like it
judging by the length, I think i had a chip on my shoulder

I started writing M/M technically at the age of twelve when i introduced my first gay character, he was barely there and he died but he died as a soldier not because he was gay. If you go to the early versions of the Dathyl stories that i was 13 when i started Terenz was always there, and his sexuality was just something about him like he was a doctor and he talked too fast. Being gay isn't a sociological choice, it isn't something that culture decides for it, it happens, get over it.
Historically those societies which looked down most on homosexuality were those that evolved from matriarchies. Actually to go back further we have to look at sexuality as a whole. If you go back to the very first civilisations, the hunter gatherers, they were primarily matriarchal, they worshipped a goddess figure, which some of you will be happy to know is a heavily pregnant woman with little detail on her head but with fat thighs and ass and big breasts. (there is one of these statures in hellboy2 when Nuada releases the tooth fairies)
the earliest religions tend to be primarily matriarchal, the mother the sun giving birth to the world. Most sun deities in very early religion are female. The reasons for this are obvious, women gave birth.
This basic change between men and women meant that women maintained an air of mystery and wonder, if the world was born a woman gave birth to it, therefore the sun which brought life - was a woman.
Then people began to settle and the hunter gatherer nature turned to a more agrarian civilisation and it's here you can see the first changes, all of a sudden the voluptuous females were replaced with a much more phallic set of symbols, like bull's heads and things like that. The reason for this is obvious too, it was easier to breed if the woman was kept healthy at home, so they found her things to do in the home, notably making flour. Archaeology of this period reveals that, women were found with damage to their knees and backs which came from months of kneeling grinding stones over flour. Men were responsible for the harder, more arduous work and the sacred feminine was, for the first time, controlled.
By the time we get to the Judeo-christian period the Jews, who we must admit created much of our laws, were persecuted by the incredibly sexually permissive Romans so anything the romans did was percieved as wrong. THey have orgies, - thou shalt not have more than one partner. Women are active in politics - you should honor your husband.
It never says anywhere in the bible that homosexuality is a sin, and believe me, I've looked.
What is interesting here is there is no mention of lesbianism. Not that it didn't happen, because it would have, but because it obviously just wasn't worth mentioning. This is most obvious in Japanese literature, it was so common that it was like describing a horse, there was simply no point. The women slept together in one room, who cared what they were doing because it didn't result in illegitimate offspring.
By the european middle ages where the concept of sex without the chance of pregnancy was drilled into the law, because to control someone it is best to control sexuality entirely, so the sins of Onan and the sins of Sodom (which were suitably vague in description) were taboo, this was translated into sleeping with older women who could not longer bear children, sleeping with men or just plain masturbating. The law said to spill seed without children as a possible result was a waste of god's gift and therefore was a sin.
interestingly but of little note to this Sin was a god of Babylon and therefore to give over to sin was to worship another god which obviously wasn't a good thing.
Sexuality was a distraction from god, and thereby the people who spoke for god, therefore logically if it detracted from the power of the church it was forbidden. To ban it ultimately would result in the human race dying out, so the law said to spill seed, or ejaculate. This as you can imagine did not include women, another nod towards lesbianism in history.
Edward II of England was famously sodomised with a red hot poker as a punishment for his male lovers, but research shows this as a historical piece of propaganda, that the scots, who had reason to hate him, created. Allegedly his screams could be heard outside the walls of York. This propaganda also served to promote the church's aim, that homosexuality was wrong and could be seriously punished with death.
By the time, historically, we get to the Victorian era we find the first serious laws about sodomy, again not about lesbianism, but this was also an era where femininity was in control and thereby a threat to the male established order. The concept of homosexuality was in many views considered a feminisation, and this would be a letting down of the brotherhood. When we look at what is easily the most famous trial for sodomy, that of Oscar Wilde it becomes apparent that he was persecuted for what he did, but who.
This fear of feminisation, a thing which culturally remains to this day, men being more frightened than women by alien which shows a "male birth" complete with blood and a phallic monster. Men are given an ideal, that they should be strong, and powerful and able to dominate women.

Now if we look at homosexuality within literature as written by women we must also look at the female opinion of literature. When men write stories of homosexuality it is about the struggle and inevitable rejection they face, when women write it it becomes a safe escapist fantasy. Homosexual literature, or homoerotica if you prefer, is a natural progression of the byronic ideal.
By the eighteenth and nineteenth century when the byronic ideal was born women had a very set outlook on life, they were born, grew up, married, bore children, died. Their goals were to find a good husband first for themselves and secondly for their own daughters. Jane Austen, who wrote before the literary creation of the true byronic hero suggested towards the darkness inherent in such characters with Mr Darcy. The Bertrand sisters of Mansfield park stepped outside of those norms and were cast out, as was Lydia in Pride and Prejudice, but then came Lord Byron.
Lord Byron was mad, bad and dangerous to know. He was a scandal, and rightly so, about town for seducing young women and notably the wife of the prime minister lord melbourne, and a woman linked to him was ruined, she would never get a good marriage.
So when women started writing love stories, albeit posing as men, their main leads became byronic, they were wicked cruel men that the women of the time could fantasise about safely, they might want Heathcliff to run off with them and ruin them totally but they didn't do anything about it. There was a safe form of escapism which naturally leaked into the burgeoning romance genre, which was born about this time, where women bought cheap serialised fictions of women being traumatised by terrible men and saved by men that were almost as wicked, as the genre became more popular the traumatised damsel was often revealed to have a secret past which would put her outside society's scorn, a perfect example of this is Lorna Doone by RD Blackmore.
If you look at Lady Chatterley's lover, a book famously banned, we must ask was it banned because it was so explicit, it's not, or because it showed a noble woman, a woman who was behaving as she ought, throwing it all away and achieving a form of independance through sexual intercourse with another byronic hero, the groundskeeper.
By common standards it sounds like a cheap heterosexual porn novel, the lady and the groundskeeper but society was outraged, not that they might read sex scenes, which weren't new to literature, but that they might promote such promiscuity amongst the lower classes.
Dame Barbara Cartland was a blessing on romance, she wrote over three hundred novels using the basic byronic model of a woman with a secret past torn between two men, one of which was a bastard but loved her utterly, and one who was a good match. There were allusions to sex but nothing overt, but porn was being written, for men.
In the modern age it is of no consequence who we marry, if we marry for love or money or whatever it's our choice this means that the escapist literature is suddenly not escapist any more, it's possible. We are not shown a safe way to explore our own inner thoughts with things we would never carry through.
Heterosexual romance should stand in that place but it presents women of such perfection that they are unreal and men that cannot exist outside of fantasy, it is an idealised form of the byronic and it's not attractive at all. This same argument can be used to explain the profligacy of vampire fiction, as women we might not want to have our throat's mauled by a wild animal reading bad french poetry at us, but that doesn't mean we don't want to dream it.
By writing and reading homosexual erotica we are claiming back that safety, we are creating characters we do not have to empathise with or even sympathise with, the bastard became frightening as it stepped within reach, but male homosexuality is something we are always going to be something we are a step removed from. It never has to be real, and because of that it's perfect. They are romances where we don't have to be involved, even vicariously, where we can stand apart and smile at the love and look at the sex without going, well that would just hurt, or worrying how it subjugates women.
That women are sidelined in these stories shows just how the genre is in it's infancy. But we must wonder are we writing "gay" fiction or are we writing fiction that features "gay" people. It is an escapist fantasy that we never have to be part of, when men fantasise about two women they picture themselves in the middle, when women fantasise about two men they don't, and i think that, ultimately, says it all.

ficlet: - a step too far

2008-08-10T13:03:04Z

FFVII for stratospherique

Reno peered into the dark room, "hey Vincent," he said flicking on the lights, "Vinnie, Vincenzo, Vin-man," Vincent's eyes narrowed as the litany continued, "Grape on the Vin, Vin-plate Vindaloo..ooo..ooo." Reno noticed as he said the last one that it might have been a step too far. "umm, I mean Vincent, Rufus wants to see you in his office."
"It is a good job that Master Shinra is passing fond of you." Vincent growled, clacking together his metal fingers in a menacing fashion.
Reno swallowed. "I know."

ba ra kei reference list

2008-08-10T01:04:29Z

this is a mostly complete list for the references in BRK
I might have missed some though

Ba Ra Kei reference list

Note- the quotes were meant to be Crawford's interpretation not Aya's, and if it's a female lyricist (not necessarily singer) there's citrus.

Chapter One

1. "if you lie on the ground
in somebody's arms
you'll probably swallow some of their history"
Suzanne Vega In Liverpool

2.Kobayakawa-sensei a reference to ES21, where ES21 is Kobayakawa Sena
3.RikkaiDai a school in prince of tennis, which is a feeder for a high school (which Ran attends) and a university, I picked it entirely for it's uniform.
4.Poe = Edgar Allen Poe, this is the author at the reading
5.swept back like Andy Garcia's in a film that Ran had watched with his sister - there was debate in the ranks over this one, I wanted it to be things to do in denver which I love, the beta wanted Night falls on Manhattan but then my mother suggested When a man loves a woman as a film more likely for a teenage girl to watch (although he looked particularly fine in Dead again)
6."take this kiss upon thy brow!
And in parting from you know
This much let me avow-" Poe from A Dream within a dream which the next is “you are not wrong” which Crawford recites to him
7.scent of his cologne, roses and herbs, = acqua di parma, a timeless scent, very hard to get but not expensive, I have a bottle of it that I bought from this shop in the city that sells hunting stuff, expensive teas and fine bone china – it's a really mad and very expensive department store called Bennetts
8.a sepulchre, whatever that was, by the sea. = from Anabel Lee by Poe, I used Anabel Lee as a psuedonym for an exchange writing Akazukin
9.holding open a battered yellow book - a penguin classic, mine cost £1.99 and has a raven on the cover, which I always thought a bargain for the complete works.
10.a band like Johnnys - the japanese equivalent of menudo, with young boys and a changing line up
11.like me trying to read Murasaki. - Murasaki wrote the first great novel The Tale of Genji, a masterpiece of Japanese literature
12.a second foreigner, slightly older than himself, with a shock of pea green hair – in one of the manga pictures Schuldig has green hair
13.He opened the book to Tartini and the piece his violin tutor had declared to complicated for a boy of his age - the devil's trill
14.The Telltale Heart – a short story by Poe about a murderer- I chose it for the pun
15.“Maybe I don't understand it
Maybe I was never meant to know
I heard he had the whole world in his hands now
But everything is still out of control” Justin Currie Angel on the Roof – it's a really obscure b-side you won't find it, I didn't (well I have it on the bside of a single but)
16.Riku – yes I named him for the boy from Kingdom hearts
17.Mafuyu – the older brother from project zero, if you pay attention it does mention his younger sister and his mother's suicide which are both mentioned in the first game
18.Nakatsu – I gave Riku the name of the soccer player in Hanakimi
19.“Hey you, are me, not so pretty
All the world I've seen before me passing by
Silent my voice, I've got no choice
All the world I've seen before me passing by
You don't care about how I feel
I don't feel it any more” System of a down ATWA
20.Schlossen-hoeffler – I chose this to be unpronouncable so the very polite japanese would use his nickname without question

Chapter 2

1.“Well he said he'd show you his bed
And the delights of the chemical smile” Suede Animal Nitrate
2.so we can storm Helm’s Deep - Games Warehouse brought out a dungeons and dragons version of the lord of the rings before the movies I figured if they were going to be gamers they'd want to storm helms deep. Ran was meant to be a huge dork in this story.
3.Miku – Mafuyu's younger sister – the main character of the first and third project zero games
4.Her friends didn’t look so much like Yankees as she did - Ai was based on Uo from Fruitsbasket so has the long blonde hair, and long skirts of a girl who hangs with a gang.
5.Hinasaki – Mafuyu's surname and the main name of the family in Project Zero
6.“Things are getting worse, but I feel a lot better
And that's all that really matters to me” Amy hit the atmosphere by the Counting Crows
7.“I was just going to stop at Star Burger. - the fast food joint that sponsors Sakuraba in ES21
8.“Eiri-san in accounting recommended this place to me, - Eiri-san in accounting is a standing joke in my fics, if anyone at work is ever mentioned it's Eiri-san in accounting who is apparently gorgeous
9.The lounge singer was met by some polite applause and bowed equally politely, his hair was dyed a brash blonde and he had an arrogance about him that suggested more than just talent. - this is meant to be Lucifer from the Neil Gaiman comic Sandman who opened a bar when he retired from hell
10.the waitress, a girl in a red hood, - Mazikeen Lucifer's right hand from the same series
11.or you fall in love with two people or that person dies, - from the letters of rupert brooke to Ka Cox
12.“I love this song,” he said, then he laughed to himself, “it reminds me of things I really shouldn’t want to be reminded of.” - this is the first mention of Song to the Siren by Tim Buckley which appears over and over throughrout the fic, Crawford in fact refers to it as “their song” this is the song that Aya sings to him at the end which is the scene crawford is referring to here.
13.“And you sang ‘Sail to me, sail to me;
Let me enfold you.’
Here I am, here I am waiting to hold you.
Did I dream you dreamed about me?” Song to the Siren – Tim Buckley
14.“And did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?” Pink Floyd – Wish you were here
15.goodnight, chuu – Crawford's cell phone message is the exact one that Soubi sends to Ritsuka in Loveless

Chapter 3

1.“From tripping on a shoelace to falling in love
You keep things under control” Justin Currie life is full
2.Todai – Tokyo university a very prestigious international university
3.okay, be safe. - this is an oblique reference to the story I wrote called Precognition in which Crawford, faced with visions of Aya when faced with a teenage Ran says repeatedly “be safe, I need you”
4.WunderX – I couldnt resist the musician in Kapitel who makes people go mad
5.Zepp Tokyo – a legitimate venue but I don't know about their slushies
6.NittleGrasper - one of the bands in Gravitation
7.Mafuyu, who carried his camera, an antique Polaroid it cost him a small fortune for film for, everywhere - another reference to project zero the camera does start as Mafuyu's until he is lost in the house when Miku finds it
8.I want you to want me
I need you to need me
I’d love you to love me
I’m begging you to beg me- I want you to want me by Cheap trick
9.a cappuccino with real cream and vanilla extract and grated chocolate on the top – a viennese which is one of SG's favourite coffees
10.They had been meant to go together to the cinema to see a Russian arthouse film - they were going to see Nightwatch but it bored me so I cancelled on them
11.kleine Japanischer puppe- Schuldig calls Ran here his little Japanese doll
12.Iceman – this was the band that actually performed Bad Luck's songs for Gravitation
13.Mafuyu’s mother is Hinasaki Miyuki – project zero again
14.He has a part time job helping the novelist Takamine Junsei. - project zero again
15.“I lived in Germany for a long time,” he said and sounded sad, - Rosenkreuz

Chapter 4

1.“Hello darkness, my old friend,
I've come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping.” Simon and Garfunkle – the sound of silence. Crawford actually listens to them a lot in this story, originally his image song in the story was going to be the Boxer but I changed my mind.
2.they smelled of jasmine and rice flowers and soap, detergent - this came from an advert for detergent on at the time
3.a small square bottle with a bakelite lid, one with a rather simple plain white label stating it’s contents, a pale gold liquid, was Crawford’s after shave. - it does look like that, and is the first unisex perfume
4.turned on some music, something soft and melodic with two men harmonising softly – simon and garfunkle again
5.Did she make you cry
Make you break down
Shatter your illusions of love” Gold Dust woman – stevie nicks
6.“I’m the king of cute with a talent for persuading
will you be my guide
I need help to find my way out.” - Justin Currie – Low friends in high places – again you won't find this but I do have it on mp3 if you must
7.The movie was expensive and meant to be important but most of the historical details were wrong and the premise was trite. - they're watching the last samurai
8.
“So,” Crawford asked, “who’d win in a fight, Jet Li or Obi Wan Kenobi?”

Ran grinned, “Han Solo,” he answered, “he’s got a gun and he cheats.” - this was a genuine conversation I had with my beta – and Jet Li by the way
9.
“If you want me to, boy
I could lie to you
You don’t need one of these
To get me inside of you” - Tori Amos She's your cocaine
10.Milk was a famous club – and it is
11.Katzchen – german for kitten
12.“Had we but world enough, and time, This coyness Lady were no crime. We would sit down and think which way To walk, and pass our long love's day. Thou by the Indian Ganges' side Shouldst rubies find; I by the tide Of Humber would complain. I would Love you ten years before the flood, And you should, if you please, refuse Till the conversion of the Jews. My vegetable love should grow Vaster than empires and more slow; An hundred years should go to praise Thine eyes, and on thy forehead gaze; - to his coy mistress by Andrew Marvell, this was the first poem I learned to recite but I picked it because it showed Crawford literally running out of time, the man in the poem is saying shag me or die alone, but Crawford is saying we have no time which is why the poem is used to preface the lemon.

Chapter 5

1."You'll never see - the courage I know
Its colours' richness won't appear within your view
I'll never glow - the way that you glow
Your presence dominates the judgements made on you" Fiona Apple – Never is a promise
2.And the vision that was planted in my brain still remains – crawford and simon and garfunkle again – this one's the sound of silence
3.“In restless dreams I walked alone. - Sound of silence again
4.
“Make a circle in the sand
Make a halo with your hand
I'll make a place for you to land.” Miami by the counting crows
5.There was a time when he would have gone to Mafuyu, but since his mother's suicide – another project zero referece
6.Aya-chan enters! Heh heh... I'm here! - the dialogue here is directly lifted from the manga
7.There were two boys behind her gaping, both wore sports jerseys and one was clearly younger than the other, perhaps by as much as two years. They were definitely younger than Aya. They were gaping at her, the older one, his hair a mass of spikes, fascinated by her hair, but the younger one scowled and didn't seem to like it one little bit. - this is one of the most subtle references but is Momoshiro and Echizen from prince of tennis just grabbing a bite to eat
8.“Hold On, I’m falling,
Can’t breathe, breathe
Hold on, and hold on
Just hold on to me” - Machine Head the burning red – also the quote which prefaces the part

Chapter 6

1.“I've got nothing to do
but hang around
and get screwed up on you.” Screamager by therapy?
2.They asked about his parents smuggling in large amounts of drugs and other contrabands – this was a reference to the drama cds
3.I've got my head, but my head is unraveling
Can't keep control, can't keep track of where it's traveling
I've got my heart but my heart is no good
And you're the only one that's understood Nine Inch nails – the perfect drug
4.a dark rust coloured rib sweater with a roll neck – the orange sweater!
5.Now I know you won't refuse
Because we've got so much to do
And you've got nothing more to lose
So take this number, and welcome – Queensryche Operation Mindcrime
6.Kitada-san – Birman's real name
7.We have an installation in Sendai, the Aoba flower centre – drama cds again
8.You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry Radiohead Creep
9.Kuroyuri's kisses were bitter – Kuroyuri is coffin bait from the drama cds
10.He wasn't Kikyou with the lingering eyes or Shion's cold disdain - this is a reference to Chalcedony Cross' amazing fic Einerrungen an die zukunft (probably spelt wrong)
11.Leave me out with the waste
This is not what I do
It's the wrong kind of place
To be thinking of you Damien Rice 9 crimes
12.Bishop, Reiichi, adjusted his glasses nervously as he sat across from Ran – Crashers Knight and Ran, one of those stories which precedes and complicates Weiss' timeline
13.maybe this time I'll be lucky, maybe this time he'll stay.” - Maybe this time from cabaret
14.Use your eyes as weapons
Deep in the night time sky
Choose your words so slowly
To watch you now I wonder why the devlins – kill with me tonight
15.The coat he had found in Crawford's closet in the apartment - Crawford supplies him with the coat and the sword, when he abandoned him to the apartment
16.The business man had begged and pleaded, the way that they all did at first – again this scene is from the manga

Chapter seven

1.“To me, you're strange and you're beautiful,
You'd be so perfect with me but you just can't see,
You turn every head but you don't see me.” Strange and beautiful by Aqualung
2..The first blow caught him unawares, - this scene is from the manga
3.Aya's dream dialogue is from the manga
4.Aya's conversation with yohji is from the manga
5.“Cheekbones like geometry and eyes like sin” - Lloyd Cole perfect skin
6.Some bigwig was using people's debts to make them fight to the death in some twisted game of chess – episode 2 of Kapitel
7.“Take your hands off me
I don’t belong to you, you see” - Marc Almond – say hello wave goodbye
8.in the back a man sung sweetly of mountains – I never wanted to be your mountain by Tim Buckley
9.“I should kill you.” Aya said bluntly.

“Yes.” Crawford answered, “but not now.” - another sign crawford knows how this will end
10.“Listen, lover,” he said, “they're playing our song.” - song to the siren by Tim Buckley

Chapter eight

1.“you have no right
to ask me now
you were never that around” Gavin Rossdale Cold Contagious
2.His white coat was spattered with blood and his hands felt empty and naked without his sword, left with Yohji in the ruins of Koua. - Gluhen
3.The hair to the left side of his face was singed away and melted into clumps, there was an angry red mark on his face, and his silk shirt was soot blackened. - In Gluhen Schuldig fights the pyrokinetic Geisel
4.Ran looked over him, holding his hand and took a deep breath, before he began, softly, to sing, “Long afloat on shipless oceans I did all my best to smile 'Til your singing eyes and fingers
drew me loving into your eyes.” - the scene crawford refers to in chapter 2
5.“I’ve got monsters,
How about you?” Keith Caputo – Got Monsters
"

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-10T00:17:00

2008-08-09T23:33:57Z

I think it's getting to the point where i need to start filtering

fic posts
waffle posts
dollfie posts
that kind of thing
this is a blather post sort of

the muse is feeling hyperactive tonight, anyone would think I'd been giving her fanta
she wants to write a character piece of werewolves and I'm not letting her

also she wants to relook at Aya
she's making strange noises at the back

it's a strange little point she's making too
in the entire anime we see Crawford kill 2 people, Hel and Berger
we see Aya kill at least 20 if not more
therefore surely aya is at least 10 times more evil
now before we argue that La Fujimiya does it for his sister, he doesn't he does it out of guilt, he lies and martyrs himself but i seriously doubt he doesn't enjoy it, probably not in the way ken does but it gives him control something he gets nowhere else
therefore if Crawford took over an evil empire would Aya be his unwilling catamite or his willing queen, a match for him in wickedness and cruelty
would Aya, without the concept of morality and being owned and what is expected of him, change entirely, would he embrace that darker side of him. I can't see the two of them engaging in things like snuff or what, but I'm thinking more like Manna's administration, two equal bastards in a relationship
and then the other part of me says sod that do it as AU, but have you seen my to do list
the muse wants me to write lots more than i physically can, she, like you i think, would like to chain me to the keyboard and stand over me with the whip
unfortunately my stamina and talent won't survive that
there isn't enough coffee in the world unfortunately
she seems to think that i can write a novel in a day (three months is my record)
i might do some very small mood pieces to catch up

any of the writers on my flist want a muse that appears to mainlain fanta
she's not housebroken, is pushy but so very good at what she does
hmmm fanta, though it makes me hyper

edit
I think i might do the bastards things as a series of interlinked shorts, not sure yet, a universe not a story, sort of like the wb side stories (I tried to write side b butterfly, it went all wrong there) hey i just realised you might be interpreting the white of WB as weiss and butterfly for madam butterfly - i never thought of that - yes I can be that dim
the real reason is much more disingenuous, it was the song I was listening to the at the time
I know you all think that the G in SG came from me being so gracious and all, but nah, i was listening to a lot of jeff buckley

I'm going to sort of take tomorrow off, and not work on tanbi although i'm reasonably sure where it's going thanks to lilymoon who is so getting the dedication on that one, it's still growing very slowly though
I'm going to actually do the reference list for Bara, all those references you knew were there but went nah

fic: Viewfinder drabble in the White butterfly universe

2008-08-08T23:13:41Z

Title: White Butterfly Sidestory for Clueless Psycho
Viewfinder Crossover
Author: Seraphim Grace
Feedback: Always appreciated and replied to.
Rating: 18.
Pairings: This drabble – Asami x Akihito
Warnings: adult scenes, adult situations

The boy was a gift from the empress as reward for services rendered. He was a svelte youth with soft light brown hair and a rather waspish expression, wearing a short child's yukuta and guards around his shins to protect him from the cold.
He was lying tied on the tatami. There was a piece of wood tied at his mouth like a bridle, but he just drooled around it. The way he lay Asami could see the pink pucker of his naked ass under the indigo yukuta.
He reached down, untied the ropes at his wrists and ankles and became aware that the boy was blindfolded as well. He removed the blindfold and the bridle. The boy looked at him with horror, wriggling and trying to back away from him.
“You belong to me now.” Asami said quietly, “for me to do what I want with.” He ran the palm of his hand up a pale thigh, pushing his legs apart to cup his balls. “And I want.”
“We're both men,” the boy protested, “it's not natural.”
The empress had a sense of humour, Asami smiled, the boy was reacting to his hands, and not fighting him off as much as trying to back away. This boy was obviously a rube from the country and his very debauching would be as pleasurable as the boy's ass.
“You belong to me now.” Asami murmured and then licked the curve of the boy's ear, “no one else will ever touch you.”
“I don't want you to touch me,” the boy protested.
Asami just laughed and bit down on the lobe of his pale ear. He sat back, loosening the collar of his kimono to bear his chest. “You'll want me to, sooner or later.”

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-08T20:42:00

2008-08-08T19:44:05Z

snerk!

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-08T15:53:00

2008-08-08T14:55:59Z

A reminder that the weiss_novella competition is running this year

the rules are very simple, 50,000 words, 1st november deadline
if you think your story might not be allowed, (shota, very au that kind of thing) just check with me,
any timeline goes, literally, from precanon, drama cds, to velvet underworld
so if you've been polishing off that novella and think you might be finished, and it's not posted anywhere else enter
all entries (if I get more than three)will be submitted for an anonymous vote
the top three entries will get a commission from an artist of their choice as prize, they will also be archived here = http://www.weisskreuzsideb.com/novella/
I'll add a judge's favourite prize as well if there are more than five entries
if I get 5 or less everyone gets a prize, maybe not a whole commission, but a prize

if you intend to enter if you could let me know, it's just so i can pencil you in and make sure I have enough prizes

ANY PAIRING WELCOME, even het.

X-posted everywhere
more details on the info page

Also although I have a shortlist of artists lined up if you can think of anyone who might want to take the commissions I'll gladly approach them, most of them dropped out last year and the more I ask, the more convinced I am that no bugger wil do it

seraphim_grace @ 2008-08-08T15:37:00

2008-08-08T14:38:08Z

Although I've been quite busy I haven't suspended the competition, in fact I've been running around behind the scenes gathering the prizes from last year, running interference between the two entrants and the artist, and gathering more artists for this year

The deadline is 1st November this year, not the 30th so you can still do Nano if you want to (and are possessed or something)

now to reiterate if you have something you're working on and weren't going to enter it but haven't posted any of it - there's no reason not to try

Ideally the top three voted entries will get a prize, what this might mean is if I get three entries you all win! if i only get 4 I might make an exception

last years entries were fantastic and are available to read here

http://www.weisskreuzsideb.com/novella/

and the commissions can be viewed there, I'm currently uploading them to photobucket to post here

thanks to the wonderful white_cross_b who donated the web space
the amazing Tsuki-chan who does not play on LJ did both commissions (weiss artists are like the loch ness monster, you hear about them, but you want to order something from them and they're gone into the mist)
just to reassure that you're not getting stick figures, well unless you ask for fishlove to do them for you
ideally you'll get a choice of artists, if the artist wants to play, still does fanart, that kind of thing.
I have some new interims, but they do vanish at the mention of payment (you'd think it would be the other way around)

to make sure i have enough prizes I'd like it if you announced your intention to enter, but this isn't compulsory, but if you do drop out please let me know
an extension can be negotiated within reason and practically anything goes, last year's entries were AU and SideB